Weekly: Sweet sincerity
I'm tired of cynicism.
Of apathy.
Of pretension.
Of judgment.
Of disconnection.
Are you, too?
Here's an antidote for we the tired: sincerity.
To be sincere means to express, honestly and truly, what is in your heart.
Somehow, we all intuitively realize that sincerity has to be connected to love. Sincerity can be present in moments of pain, anger and hurt — when the people involved are grounded in the goal of moving towards greater love. Sincere repairs, apologies, and acts of courage often lead to the greatest transformations. But one cannot be sincere in seeking to inflict pain, anger, or hurt upon another person, because that is disconnected from love.
That's because your inner nature is pure goodness, and sincerity is the expression of that nature. That’s why it’s a superpower: coming from within, it pierces swiftly through all of those things that get in the way of loving better — cynicism, apathy, pretension, judgment, and disconnection.
If someone is sincere with you, they’re inviting you into a space of humanity, a connection between the-goodness-in-them and the-goodness-in-you. They're showing you who they really are: a fellow human being, who errs yet who wants to be more and more of themselves. In their sincerity, new frontiers of love is possible, even in the most painful moments. How many of us have been hurt, and had that hurt lifted in the form of a truly sincere apology? How many of us have felt loneliness fade away due to an act of sincere kindness? How many of us have been elevated by the sincere expression of artists or the true stories of our fellow travelers? It’s this love that can transfigure so many of the ills of our world.
Our false selves are powerless before sincerity, and that is why it is so powerful. Sincerity asks us to confront our mistaken beliefs about who we are and to correct them, one interaction at a time.
In Haruki Marukami's Dance Dance Dance, he writes, “People die all the time. Life is a lot more fragile than we think. So you should treat others in a way that leaves no regrets. Fairly, and if possible, sincerely. It's too easy not to make the effort, then weep and wring your hands after the person dies.”
Sincerity requires effort, yes — and how that effort matters to others! And how it comes back to you, in the form of connection, meaning, and love! What a worthy endeavor.
A life of treating people sincerely seems, to me, one of the greatest goals to aspire to achieve. And it’s one that is in reach: in each moment, we can choose sincerity, slowly but surely bringing more of our collective goodness to the world.
Sincerely yours,
Stephanie Harrison, founder of The New Happy
This Week
To be sincere, there are two roadblocks you have to overcome: connecting with your true nature and overcoming the fear of expressing that nature.
Try This
Here's the first step: ask yourself, what is the most loving thing I can say or do in this moment? Love takes many forms: being kind, yes, but also being brave, daring, empathetic, considerate, patient, and strong. Figure out what is needed in this particular moment.
Then, if that action scares you, acknowledge the fear. Many of the most loving acts are scary to practice, but taking them will lead you towards a better outcome. One helpful exercise is to grab a piece of paper and write down three things: 1) the outcome you're most afraid of, 2) the likeliest outcome, and 3) what you'll do for both.
Finally, take the step: align your inner goodness with your expression. Sincerity in action.
More Tips and Tools
1. Letting go (Podcast)
2. Make my world brighter (Instagram, TikTok)
3. Stop comparing (Instagram)
4. Find a balance (Instagram)
5. How to interrupt yourself (Instagram)
6. Fully experience each day (Instagram)
7. The challenge doesn't define you (Instagram)
Community
What's something sincere you said or did recently?
"I told my business partner how impressed I was with how hard he is working for his dreams."
"I forgave myself for holding onto something that didn't serve me."
"I was sincere about my lack of abilities and was met with compassion and offers of help."
"I lent money to a friend. I knew it would mean a lot to her right now."
"I apologized for being selfish."
"I apologized to my child for making him feel like he disappointed me."
"During a very stressful day I danced by my 2 year old daughter because she wanted to. Joyful!
"Owned my weakness and strength in getting through it."
Read more
Please remember this: your sincerity is a gift to the world. It makes it safer for others to be sincere, too. Your courage matters and contributes to a more loving world.
Inspiration
1. Poems for George Harrison (WePresent) — Written by his wife after his death, these embody sincerity.
2. A 6,000 year miracle (Washington Post) — A baby bison! A sincere ray of hope!
3. This painting has been upside down all along (Guardian) — Everyone makes mistake; here's a story about embracing them with sincerity.
Before You Go
Thank you for reading
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