Weekly: You are worthy
Old Happy: What I do dictates how valuable I am. New Happy: Nothing I do or don't do will ever change my worth.
From an early age, Old Happy culture—derived from the forces of individualism, capitalism, and domination—teaches us that our worthiness is based on what we achieve. You’re worthy if you’re productive, if you’re successful, and if you achieve certain goals.
But when that is your basis of self-worth, the consequences are predictable:
It feels like you can never stop achieving.
You can never stop being productive. You can never stop pushing yourself. You can never stop competing with others. You have to grit your teeth through burnout and illness and grief and loss and pain to keep working harder and harder—because you have been taught that your value is externally derived from what you do. This also explains why we are all so terrified of not being productive and successful, of pausing, of taking breaks, of treating ourselves like human beings.
This is the question I am asked more than any other: "What do I need to do to feel good enough?"
And here is the answer: you don't need to do anything. In fact, you need to stop doing something. Stop evaluating whether or not you are good enough. Take the question off the table. That's the only way to stop yourself from constantly looking for evidence that you are worthy or not worthy, a stream of self-monitoring that keeps you somehow both stressed and exhausted.
Decide now: I'm worthy. And whenever something happens that makes you want to go back and question it, come back to this moment—to this date in August—and remind yourself you decided that you would no longer ask yourself this question, because you recognized the truth of your innate worth.
Tips and Tools
1. Wasted my day — This week's animation.
2. From resistance to acceptance — How to make the shift.
3. What's good — Decide for yourself.
4. Make them glow — The power of a compliment.
5. We feel the same — Our shared emotions.
More from TNH
Book — Order New Happy today to find true happiness.
Podcast — Get a daily morning pep talk — in five minutes or less
Speaking — Book us to speak to your team about well-being, resilience, and productivity.
Articles — Read more articles on our website.
Community
What would you do if you weren’t afraid?
“I’d apply to med school.”
“Call my old friend and apologize.”
“I would be myself.”
“Get back together with my ex. I miss him everyday but I’m scared to have my heart broken again.”
“Quit my job and travel for a bit.”
“Stand up for myself.”
Before You Go
The Definitive Guide to Happiness
A groundbreaking new approach based on a decade’s worth of research and brought to life with beautiful artwork, New Happy shows you the proven path to happiness.
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