Weekly: Let go again
Old Happy: "I have to hold tightly to make sure it's okay." New Happy: "I can let go and trust that it will be okay."
You want that person to change. You want the past to have gone differently. You want the future to go your way.
One of the hardest things about being human is that at the end of the day, we don’t have a lot of control over what happens to us. This is incredibly hard on our well-being, because as human beings, we absolutely love being in control and absolutely hate having no control.
That’s why we cling onto things. We think that it gives us the control that we long for. Unfortunately, though, this clinging just needs to new pain. Think about the burden that you’ve put upon yourself by trying to control the uncontrollable. As hard as it is to acknowledge, it must be done: you can’t change that person, you can rewrite the past, you can’t control the future.
If you’re ready to let go, there’s a tool we’ve developed to help you. It’s called the 4 C’s.
Clinging: Name what you’re holding onto. You can usually identify it by asking yourself, “What am I trying to control in this moment?”
Compassion: Acknowledge any pain you’re in and extend love to yourself, saying something like, “It’s okay that I want this.”
Choose: Now that you’ve named it, you have the opportunity to decide whether you choose to let go of what you’re clinging to. Would it serve you more to hold onto it—or to let go of it?
Courage: If the answer is ‘let go,’ take one brave step towards releasing it.
You could say an affirmation: “I release what I’m holding onto.”
It could be an intention: “Today, I will let go of this.”
It could be an action: writing in a journal, talking to a friend, closing your phone, making a choice.
Or it could be an inaction: refusing to engage further with it or ceasing to fight reality.
Letting go is not something you do once. It’s something you do over and over again. Every time you let go, you free yourself a little bit more, until suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, you realize that you have truly moved forward into a new phase of your life — one of greater peace and happiness.
Tips and Tools
1. You didn't waste the day — This week's animation.
2. Worthy with every step — Not at the end.
3. Today you will feel — All emotions are okay.
4. How to be curious — Open that mind.
5. It will change — A truth that can heal.
More from TNH
Book — Order New Happy today to find true happiness.
Podcast — Get a daily morning pep talk — in five minutes or less
Speaking — Book us to speak to your team about well-being, resilience, and productivity.
Articles — Read more articles on our website.
Community
What do you want to let go of?
"My past."
"Needing validation from others (my boss, my dad, my peers) to feel like I'm worthy and doing life right."
"My old self."
"The shackles of self-doubt."
"The fear of failing and fear of judgement."
"Rumination and worry about work."
Before You Go
The Definitive Guide to Happiness
A groundbreaking new approach based on a decade’s worth of research and brought to life with beautiful artwork, New Happy shows you the proven path to happiness.
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