Weekly: Celebrate our joy

Old Happy: "I'm happy when things go right for me."
New Happy: "I'm happy when things go right for us."

There is one profoundly simple strategy for more happiness that almost no one uses — all because of Old Happy conditioning.

Here it is: Find happiness in other people’s happiness.

In Old Happy culture, we’re taught that we’re separate from other people. That means that, if something good happens to you, it belongs to you and only brings you happiness (and I should be jealous of you, because it means that I didn’t get those good things and the happiness that they bring.)

What that means, though, is that your happiness is entirely dependent on you, and making sure that things going well—for you and for you alone. If you have a setback, or a bad day, or life otherwise doesn’t go how you want it to go, you become unhappy.

But if you see that you are connected to others, then that all changes. Because now, if something good happens to you, it also happens to me. I can find joy in your joys, exactly the same way I would for my own joys.

This perspective shift can completely change your life. It removes so much of the pressure that we put on ourselves to control and achieve and win. When the people in your life succeed, or fall in love, or have a great day at work, or make a difference for someone, or create something beautiful, you get to feel that right alongside them.

So open up to it. Let yourself feel the joy of others as though it was your own—because that's what makes it your own, too.

Tips and Tools

1. Loved for all that we are — This week's animation.

2. Make it uniquely yours — The path that's right is yours.

3. How to grieve — Three questions.

4. Live by your values — Yours matter here.

5. Finding your purpose — It's about your part.

More from TNH

Book — Order New Happy today to find true happiness.

Podcast — Get a daily morning pep talk — in five minutes or less

Speaking — Book us to speak to your team about well-being, resilience, and productivity.

Articles — Read more articles on our website.

Community

What do you do to feel joy?

"Dance Argentine tango for fun every week:) it brings me so much joy!"

"I garden. I start seeds, nurture them, then at the right time plant outside. More nurturing; weed, water, provide support, inspect, prune, and ultimately I pick the harvest. Then I start all over again."

“Play badminton.”

“Food photography and blogging!”

“Draw my thoughts in an abstract style.”

Read more